So I’m looking for advice on child maintenance. Last year I was assaulted by my daughter’s father, the result was that i fell pregnant with my daughter. I suffered from severe hyperemesis which resulted in me not pressing charges but also they said there wasn’t enough evidence.
I contacted the cms and they arranged payments with him straight to my account. The first month i received messages saying he apparently was kicked out from his mothers home and so had to move and he can’t afford his rent so can’t pay. The next month he said he didn’t want to pay bit then did then start making payments, after that he told me he had “stomach failure” I laughed at this and “pulled muscles” so couldn’t work but child maintenance then said he had to pay they could see what he’s been paid.
Anyway now his excuse is that he’s apparently now got himself sectioned! Cms have sent me a letter saying he doesn’t have to pay anything and I’m honestly furious.
Last year we were talking as friends i felt sorry for him. He gave me a sob story about how he had a severe heart condition which i later found out was a lie. He used this to real me in.
Now he gets away with paying absolutely nothing! He would go to the extent of getting himself sectioned to avoid paying. It’s disgusting to be honest. But I don’t feel there’s much I can do, this is why I’m asking for advice to see if anyone has any suggestions?
They were going to change to direct pay but then my case was taken over by this other woman who then said to give him longer he then didn’t pay and she’s wiped the arrears which I don’t feel is right.
And well he has to have some sort of mental illness because saying no to him is never an option. He has this whole sense of control thing going on. Starts off as a hypochondriac makes you feel sorry for him then takes advantage of that. So there is something there.
I can be patient and wait, but I just haven’t had much luck with the cms. Although it’s easier for them to just wipe his debt it’s not entirely fair. With my son his father and I had an agreement after we split up. Things just weren’t working out. But then after some time he decided to not bother with our son. So was csa then went to them and he’d leave his job get a new one leave again and what not. The arrears built up and then switched to cms he pays through collect and pay now but has now kept a stable job. Though he still doesn’t want to see his son because he’s got a new girlfriend. He also has a daughter who he doesn’t see born last year.
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