Morning, I’m nearly a year into this single.Mum life and I thought we were getting by, I took on a second job before my ex decided he wasn’t happy and wanted to move out, we agreed he’d have the boys every Sunday while I worked and he’d see see them in the week or speak on the phone whenever he can. Over the summer holidays the started losing interest, he needed “weekends away” then he was “working away” and off the back of that he went on a weeks holiday, which he allegedly told me about ages before?!? I keep having to miss shifts because I don’t have anyone else who can help me out with the boys and it’s leaving me struggling to pay the bills…. The Friday before his holiday he asked if he could pick the boys up from school and then invited himself and his friend back to my house, I felt really uncomfortable so I asked if he’d mind if I went to meet a friend (stay out of the way) I stayed out later than I should have but it’d been ages since I’ve had any time to myself. When I got home my house was empty and no note or message to say where they were, he wouldn’t answer his phone and I was trembling in panic (irational I know) the next morning theboys were dropped off at the door no apologies or explanation. Later in the week I tried to call him and he admitted he intended to upset me, that he’d seen his ass because he’d had other plans. He was meant to be back this weekend but I arranged for his Mum to have our boys so I could work as we weren’t speaking, I made sure he knew where they were so he could see them. But last minute my eldedest was invited to a sleepover at a friends so I asked my ex if he could pick him up in the morning so Grandma didn’t have to mither…he said he’d “made other plans” can anyone give me any advice? He’s meant to have them this weekend…but has yet to make any arrangements and I can’t afford not to work.
I have suggested the every other weekend idea, that he needs to collect from school on a Friday and take them on a Monday morning every other weekend, but he thinks it’s unreasonable. I can’t see how I can enforce it? Its frustrating because we were getting on and things were working for us and now he’s changing things. I dont want to give up my job I really enjoy it, but where can you find childcare on a Sunday? He is giving me the minimum child matinance and I’m receiving some benefit. I know I made a mistake staying out late…but normally he puts the boys to bed at mine, he hasn’t got anywhere for them to sleep at his he’s living in a shared house. Also why I asked Grandma to babysit as she has a spare room for them
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