I am new to the forum. I am just wondering what the deal is when it is not my day with the kids, can I still go watch their football matches & performances. My ex is quite difficult to deal so can’t arrange details with him, would be good to know what the norm is.
It’s best to speak directly with the club/school involved. I get invited but haven’t gone yet because I’m worried about upsetting/distracting my child (who is young) – conflict of loyalty is something worth thinking about. But it depends on the age and how they are accepting your split. If it’s going to cause a scene, I personally wouldn’t. But as I say, speak to the organisers and the child themselves if you can.
I am resident parent to our 2 boys and that side of it I have never even asked my ex or vice versa we both get school letter and emails and you both have a right to be there for your child. I do not get on with my ex so if it’s an event like a school play and on on different days we go on different days if it’s parents evening he books his own appointment and sports day we just stand away from each other our kids are happy with this and know that we are both there. I would definitely say yes if you are willing for the same in return if an event on your contact days because at the end of the day all of us as parents have to keep the kids as priority and what they need and want to happen it’s not about us.
Thanks for the advise. Interesting points to consider. It wouldn’t cause a scene as I would keep my distance and it is unlikely that the kids would find it distressing. Totally happy for it the other way round, as you say H it is about them not us.