Breastfeeding/ safeguarding and contact

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  • #24662 Report



    just wondering if anyone here has experience or suggestions that might be able to help me?

    brief background:

    i left my husband in December whilst pregnant due to what I came to realise was domestic abuse.

    i also disclosed some of the things that my husband had done/said to our son and so social worker and safe guarding have/are involved

    we are in the process of court and child arrangements order because he is so difficult and manipulative

    he is wanting our 3 yr old every weekend 9am Saturday- 6 pm Sunday.

    he currently has him 9.15-1.45 Saturday and 9-5 Sunday’s every week. Prior to me leaving he had barely ever looked after our son and had only looked after him once 18 months ago overnight and didn’t cope.

    he is seeing our 11week old baby girl twice per week for an hour at a time at a contact centre

    he is continuing the abuse via contact, he’s given undertaking in court not to threaten me or contact me except for stuff to do with the kids…… so he contacts me all the time about the kids

    neither of us have family or friends locally who can help with contact and I’m breastfeeding both children

    i have to write a statement of what I think contact should be long term for each child and I’m waiting to see a social worker report which will advise the court what they think the contact should be but everyone keeps telling me that the contact centre can’t be a long term solution which I understand but I also can’t magic something out of nowhere:(

    can anyone give me any ideas for contact esp when I don’t want to have to be around my ex but need to be around to feed the baby?!

    Thanks in advance

    #24673 Report

    Hi Lily56

    I’m sorry you are going through a difficult time.  Its important that you get the right advice and guidance.  I recommend that you contact our Single Parent Helpline.

          Gingerbread Single Parent Helpline – Freephone 0808 802 0925

    Opening hours: Mon 10 – 6, Tues 10- 4, Wed 10 – 1 & 5 – 7, Thurs 10 – 4, Fri 10 – 4  They can be busy so callers can expect to wait up to 20 minutes before the call is answered.

    I will be sending you a personal message with some further signposting options.

    Take care, Justine

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