Breach of Court Order?

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  • #58671 Report


    Hi everyone,

    Just looking for advice from anyone who has successfully (or not) applied for a Breach of Childcare Arrangements order. It’s complicated so I won’t go into too much detail.

    My ex-partner and I share equal 50/50 custody of our children. We have a childcare arrangements order in place which dictates what days/times they spend with us both. It is unfortuantley not an amicable situation. The question I have is… Is my ex-partner technically breaching the order if she is turning up to events, parties, school drop-offs etc which are during the days/times dictated as “my” time in the court order?

    It’s suffocating and controlling but I cannot afford legal representation. I am considering applying for a breach but again, before paying the court fee to do so, I’d be interested to hear anyone else’s similar experiences as it seems to be a grey area.

    Thanks 😊

    #58679 Report



    my thoughts are, if on the days the child is in your care, your ex turns up at school and does not let you take them home after school, then that looks like a blatant breach of the order. if your order does not explicitly forbid her from attending events like parties, sports days etc during the days you have kids, then I don’t think you have a case for it being a breach of the order. the other day a dad posted something similar, but opposite situation. he has order, but his ex wont allow any additional time. So I suggested to him, what if he spoke with the teachers there and ask can he be present in class, to help child settle into new school year, or volunteer to help out in the class during school hours.

    #58681 Report

    Andrew uk

    Contact a McKenzie Friend. They might be able to help.

    #58700 Report


    This doesn’t constitute a breech if she, the kids mum, is turning up to school events or parties as a parent also invited.

    As for turning up at the school gates… If they are going back to yours & you still have the 50/50 is it really such a big deal?

    Kids aren’t objects or possessions each of you own, they are developing humans you are both responsible for the wellbeing & nurturing of. – if the kids aren’t distressed by seeing their mother & there are no safe-guarding issues… It seems more like an issue between you both… Rather than putting the kids first or of any risk of harm to the kids.

    Going back to court over something so small seems a bit hypersensitive/  tit for tat or using a mallet to squash an ant. – perhaps even controlling on your side too.

    If her presence is distressing you and this is more about, as you say ‘my’ time or ego … Might be worth having some therapy to resolve these feelings & move on, with the kids wellbeing put first.

    Probably not what you want to hear, but the alternative is costly likely stressful court hearings which likely would be laughed at in court…

    The kids won’t thank you for not being able to get along, or being so upset or caught up with having to tolerate eachother presence for short moments … their feelings are likely overshadowed.

    Focus on your kids happiness. If your both going to be in their life, it’s better for them if you can learn how to be on the same team. This is something they will thank you for.

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