My husband ended our marriage two weeks ago, we were together 11 years, and have a 2 y/o boy.
Things had been rocky since Christmas, but I never really saw it coming, and the last 2 weeks have been hell. My ex is a great dad, and I hope we can sort out custody when he finds a place of his own, but at the minute I am in pure despair. Everything is so overwhelming.
I have lots of friends, all but one of whom are married with young kids. They are supporting me as much as they can, but sometimes being in their company hurts as it makes me realise the family things me & my son are missing out on.
Sorry to sound so mopey but I don’t know where to turn ATM,
Welcome! It’s really overwhelming right now, but as someone who found out they were separating on April Fools day (the irony!), I can tell you that it does get better – the clouds start to clear, and the thoughts of “what if I did this” and “”what will we do when that happens” will start to become less frequent, and you’ll be able to think more clearly. At the moment, just take small steps – things will sort themselves out, and you will feel better.
If you want a general chat, there’s a Friday night Social thread on here where there’s usually a group of people chatting, who are all in the same boat; feel free to join in, it does help.
Most important thing is you’re clearly doing the best you can for your Son, which is key – it may not feel like it sometimes but you are doing great and it will get better.
Exactly my story F1madmum, word by word. My husband moved out 2 months ago. Believe me the pain you are feeling will dull with every week and month that passes. I’m still in tears 2-3 times most days, but I recover more quickly and have even had days in between when I actually feel marginally good. I take comfort in the little things but most of all my 2 y/o boy. The temptation to hate his dad and to make things ugly is too great at times but I’m trying not to let that get to me. I still can’t do anything good for myself, take time out or treat myself like people keep asking me to, but I have planned a few things just for myself in 2-3 months time. I believe in the circle of time, good comes after bad, if it’s rough right now, then we only have to ride it until the good times come back again. Just keep going and come and talk to us here whenever it all gets too much. We are all in the same place here, just doing our best x