Boyfriend left me after 18.years

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    Clwri_64
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    My ex of almost 18 years walked out on my and his 2 children in Nov last year . It was a complete shock to me he says he just can’t do this any more and he no longer feels the same way he says he tryed to ignore it and carry on and. He feels as tho we have drifted apart and we are just friends

     

    I’m really struggling to believe it. He treated me so good. Called me his princess and baby girl always telling me how much he loved me and he couldn’t live without me. Surprised me with things all the time and was very affectionate to me. Cuddles when we was both half asleep I miss him so much it really hurts

     

    He had just bookeed us a holiday abroad for next year. Got us a new dog in September and ordered us some meat for Christmas dinner why would he do these things if he wasn’t happy and wanted out

     

    I let him do whatever he wanted to do. I never did anything. He was my whole life my world and I was his he told me all the time

     

    I struggled to understand why he Hadd left me. I never noticed anything wrong until the week before he left he wasn’t sleeping or eating properly I asked him what was wrong and he just says I don’t know I just can’t sleep. I thought he was just tired as he had worked nonestop everyday for 3 weeks

     

    We had a great life we went on holidays abroad we went out. On daytrips we was a proper loving family

     

    I haven’t worked in 15 years as he was earning enough to support us all financially. I looked after the children cooked and cleaned and looked after him

     

    I found out yesterday he is seeing a pretty blonde girl from work he had known for 6 weeks prior to him leaving me she is 8 years younger than me and he seems really happy. He says that him leaving had nothing to do with her and that it just happened and he’s sorry for everything he knows it’s hard for me to understand. I don’t know if I believe him

     

    All I could think of was getting him back since he left I’ve just been begging him not to leave me. I didn’t believe we was over untill recently

     

    He is my first boyfriend my first love my first everything and I was his I was 18 when we met he was 16

     

    How can he just replace me like that and throw me away like we was nothing. I cant think of being with anybody but him it has absolutely destroyed me

     

    I have no job no life and my future has just disappeared. He was my everything all I have left are my kids

     

    I have a couple of friends but with covid I cannot see them

     

    My mum lives close by but I try and pretend I’m OK as she is hurting too and I don’t want to upset her more

     

    Im not saying we was perfect all the way through, he treated me bad in the past and I forgave him time and time again. He completely changed his ways and his family was every thing to him

    Anybody else been through anything similar

    I’m sorry for the long post

    #48154 Report

    Lullabelle
    Participant

    Oh lovely,

    I’m so sorry this happened to you. It must be overwhelming right now.

    My only advice is to take one day at a time. Although it’s hard, try not to beg him to come back. He may have made a bad decision but you can’t make up his mind for him, you can only control how you react.

    All I can say is that I think you’re stronger than you think you are. You birthed children and spent all your time dedicated to them, their father and their home. You’re strong and you will get through this. I will just take some time.

    Have you discussed maintenance with him? Is he going to give you some money towards your kid’s care?

    Hope you’re ok. xx

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