been a single dad for 6-7weeks. seeking friends as gave up work.

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Viewing 15 posts - 1 through 15 (of 18 total)
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  • #15572 Report

    Doc4443
    Participant

    hi all

    im new to this site. ive been a single dad for about 6-7weeks after being with my ex for 10 years, i gave up work so she could start and i lost her. My kids mean everything to me and when they arent around i feel so lonely. i havent spent time with any adults since the split and im looking for friends to help me focus on a better life for myself and the kids. The ex is already with another guy and. im just living day by day for the kids. The ex speaks to the kids twice a day but from the last time she saw them to when she next shes them it will have been 11days.

    #15574 Report

    Gingey28
    Participant

    Hey hope ur ok here for a chat when u need

    I’m a single mum the dad never been involved bit shit but that is way it is

    #15576 Report

    Doc4443
    Participant

    thanks.

    im trying to do everything i can. but its alot harder than i think. when she was depressed i was there for her. she visited her family etc. i took time off work to help her. guess its the joys of being 33 moving away from ur family and friends for the one u love. then when u give up work and let them go to work they find someone else and leave u.

     

    #15577 Report

    Dove
    Participant

    Hi doc, I’m single dad too and only signed up to gingerbread today. This is my first post and I too am looking for support. I can’t advise as I’m only 5 months into my separation and everything is still a battle. I’ve 2 little ones who live with me and I’m quite happy to bounce our frustrations off each other if it helps.

    #15580 Report

    Doc4443
    Participant

    hi dove thanks buddy. im kinda lucky that we arent battling about it. we are trying to be as civil as possible. the only issue seems to be the new guy that she met through this  job. ive got so many people telling me to let her sink or swim. but my heart says 1 thing and my head is saying something elese

     

    #15583 Report

    Dove
    Participant

    Hiya doc.

    I think all I can say is to take time for yourself.

    When my separation kicked off I thought I was coping. Kids in before and after school clubs, went to work, cleaned house, clothes, kids etc. But I was running on adrenaline for 3 months which eventually runs out. I had to take time off to try and get myself in a better place so I can care properly for my kids. My first six weeks sick was strangely downhill. Couldn’t be bothered to do anything helpful to my situation. I’m getting more active now and still doing (hopefully) everything I can as a FT dad. I’m back to work in a couple of weeks and I hope that goes ok. But taking this time to initially slob, but then pull my self up, I hope, will allow me to cope better.

    You can do little to effect your ex’s relationship but you can be better to yourself and therefore your children. I’d personally let her get on with it. Take time to grieve your loss and focus on a little you time. It is hard to do but will help in the long run.

    #15585 Report

    Doc4443
    Participant

    hi dove,

     

    thanks for the advice buddy. ive got myself into a gym and im doing around 10-12hrs a week in the gym, the diet i put myself on dropped me from 19stone to 17stone. and im defo feeling better for it. I have a daily routine in place which seems to work well. My biggest killer is being lonely on a night time after 8pm once the kids go to sleep. i used to be up till 2-3am but  now i limit myself to 11pm and wake up at 0645each morning for a shower and to get dressed before i wake the kids up. i was big into online gaming but due to that being an issue in my marriage i can hardly stand being on a computer anymore. i dont read books or watch normal t.v. sometime i try to put a film on but most of the time it brings me memories. I just wish i had company from 8pm till i go to bed at 11 or something new i could set my mind on. At the moment im stuck in limbo waiting to find out just how much i will get a month from universal credit at the end of the month and then i can start to work out my my budget. the ex is giving me money towards the kds but she cant afford to do much. she is trying to save to get her own place go on a holiday in november pay for a passport etc. i dont need for money i can cope on what ive got as long as my kids have what they need i will get by.

    i think with me its all about time. some people call me a mug if she cae back i would take her back. i still love her and think her world is turned upside down but i cant live on the wat if. so i just stick to the day by day for the kids

     

    #15688 Report

    Tiggs12e
    Participant

    Hi,

    I only signed up today. My partner left 6 weeks ago. And im struggling to gain any sort of social life and adult chat. If i can help let me know.

    Kate x

    #15707 Report

    Anastasia
    Participant

    Hi everyone on this post, I’m reading this through my tears …  My husband left me and my three kids for the whole summer to go to Greece with his mum who has never really liked me, been insanely jealous and driven a wedge between us.  He left us with no money while he was away, and I eventually broke down completely and said some really nasty things (I have no family or support network here and 3 kids 24/7 without cash or much sleep takes its toll).

    When he was due to come home, he walked out on us completely.  I’m broken and I’m so sorry to hear all of your stories too.

    I still haven’t really recovered from the holidays and I’ve just found out my dad in Ireland has been taken into hospital with internal bleeding.

    I have to throw a house party for 25 teenagers on Saturday and I just feel like I’m being tortured.

     

    Just wanted to say hi to everyone here, as its good to chat to people and offload.  I really hope you’re all doing ok

    Ana x

    #15720 Report

    Angel3018
    Participant

    Hey,

    I am in similar situation husband ran off with another women left me and the kids to get on with it no regret his side. He’s turned so nasty which isn’t like him but I’m starting too see I didn’t really know him. My kids are struggling but I’m getting there I think.

    Any advice would be fab.

    hugs to everyone this is a pretty tough time for all.

    #15723 Report

    Dustypink
    Participant

    Hey all,

    I’m new here too!!!

    Single mum with 5 children.

    I’m really hoping to meet some new friends, just having a chat or laugh x

    #15727 Report

    Anonymous
    Inactive

    Hi

    I’ve been a single dad for over 2 years to 3 young boys. It has been really stressful at times and it is lonely being single dad.

    The mother is very unreliable and has put the boys at risk by her criminal boyfriends. I’m still going through the courts over her access.

    Happy to make friends. I’m new here too.

    Warren

    #15732 Report

    Dustypink
    Participant

    I’m in the Lancashire area, is anyoke in this area?

    #15734 Report

    fipple
    Participant

    Ana…thats all very terrible….ive been through some issues officially from aug 1st to the present….i havent a clue where the summer went!

     

    Although matters have calmed down..or rather i am dealing with matters more productively…

     

    If you genuinely need to just vent or general chat…by all means message me here of privately…either way !

     

    regards

    Mark

    #15751 Report

    Joolz31
    Participant

    I’m a single parent now. Just joined today. What we all need is 5 portions of fun a day not fruit! We should start a WhatsApp group and share  a cheesy joke or a little moan if the day is turning out to be pants! X

Viewing 15 posts - 1 through 15 (of 18 total)

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