Anxiety and low mood

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  • #41937 Report

    Emlou30
    Participant

    Hi all,

    Does anyone here suffer with bad anxiety? I had it before being a parent but the stresses and worries of being a single parent along with our situation and health etc has exasperated things. I always feel like I’m on the edge of a panic cliff. I manage a bit pushing on and trying to get a better job, security etc but things build and i just feel like i cant breathe and everything becomes too much. I’ve lost so much self confidence over the years through work and being in this situation. I wondered if anyone had any tips or advice or even just to say they get it! I feel alone in this feeling. My child is so so happy and loved, but I feel I’m struggling so much inside with all this torment and finding things difficult!

     

    #41943 Report

    Emi44
    Participant

    Hello, yes I can relate. It’s worse at night.
    How old is your child? I think it’s hard to juggle children and work and not feel panic. There is very little time for you I’m guessing! I found that feeling panicky made me feel less confident and feeling less confident made me panicky, so it was a circle. Do you have any time for you? X

    #41944 Report

    AmyLoves383
    Participant

    Morning

    Yes I can completely relate. I have horrific health anxiety and I’m on the waiting list with Healthy Minds to get some CBT although I don’t hold much hope. I try and practice Mindfulness which really helps me calm down and be in the present moment. I would definitely recommend it. You’re not alone, it’s damn hard work. I’ve started getting breathless and I’m terrified I’m ill but really I know I’m just extremely anxious. It’s crippling isn’t it!

    Amy, mummy to George, 2. xx

    #41945 Report

    Hellie
    Participant

    Yes I have it bad right now , house hold changing and not sure what’s going to happen next .

    #41946 Report

    Emlou30
    Participant

    Hi @Emi44 thank you for replying. I find it worse at night too as it seems to build up in the day and you’ve time to sit and think more dont you. My son is 3. How old are your children/ child? I am trying to change my job as mine makes me deeply unhappy which is adding to it as I also just dont have confidence anymore and the knock backs and trying to push myself is feeling very raw at the moment. I’m sorry you struggle with your confidence from panic and anxiety too, it’s so so rough.

    I have a bit of time if my son sees his dad but with lockdown and my sons health not being great it’s not been much at all. He doesnt stay out overnight or anything so I’m limited to me time. What about you?

    Do you know much about your triggers for panic?x

    #41947 Report

    Emlou30
    Participant

    Hi @AmyLoves383 I’m so sorry to hear about your health anxiety. I can completely relate, I used to have very bad health anxiety where i was always thinking something was very wrong with my heart or lungs specifically, which anxiety symptoms from it made it really bad with me hyperventilating all the time when relaxed and going to bed and my heart racing and thumping in my chest all the time with panic attacks. It was crippling, I did find CBT helped so I hope it helps you and that gives you some kind of reassurance. I found because I couldn’t escape my body that I had no choice but to face it head on everyday and it was horrendous but could only get so bad until my head with CBT had to deal with it if that makes sense. Do you suffer with panic attacks with it?

    Also, I agree that it is really hard to tell your brain that it is anxiety when you feel the physical symptoms of breathlessness etc. Do you have much support with your little boy? X

     

    #41948 Report

    Emlou30
    Participant

    Hi @Hellie I’m sorry you’re going through some changes. Any change is scary when we have anxiety isnt it 🙁 I hope you have people to help you with the changes to help your anxiety x

    #41950 Report

    Wivanay79
    Participant

    Hiya

    You’re definitely not on your own. If you can access some help I would suggest you do. Over the years I’ve tried various things, counselling, CBT, meditation, exercise, all of which do help. As has already been mentioned, mindfulness is a good way to ground yourself. CBT helps rationalise unhelpful thoughts, if you’re anything like me, my head uses past events to try to pre-empt what may happen in any given moment, or just randomly come up with every possible negative outcome to stop me doing things. You can work with it, it was quite weird at first, going against everything my head was telling me, because I thought it was there to keep me safe, but it was a safety mechanism gone into overdrive, and had started being detrimental to my life. It does get better, and you’re talking about it which is a big step in itself. I was quite lucky in that I’d addressed it before I had my son, but it definitely reared its head for a while in the early days. Insecurities came back up, what kind of parent will I be, can I provide for him, am I going to manage on this amount of sleep etc etc. But I did, do, and can, it’s just a negative thought process my head jumps down automatically, I just have to reign it in some days, and it is doable, it just takes some practice.

    #41952 Report

    Hi all

    This is a really interesting thread and demonstrates how many single parents are living with anxiety in everyday life.  I am so pleased to see you all sharing this and connecting with each other.  An organisation that may be able to provide you with some information and support is an organisation called No Panic.  Their details follow and I hope this is useful.

    Kind regards, Justine

    • No Panic – https://nopanic.org.uk/  – 0844 9674848  No Panic specialises in self-help recovery and the services include providing people with the skills they need to manage their condition and work towards recovery, enabling them to lead more fulfilled lives.

    #41990 Report

    MandyD
    Participant

    Hi, I had this when I split with my ex husband I had my mum who tried her best but was a bit too pushy and my best friend who was and is happily married so even though she was amazing and always there I felt she oculd never understand working full time while raising a small toddler on your own while still dealing with a controlling ex who wouldn’t let me live even though he had meant someone new. My mum ended up calling my doctors and got me into seeing someone to talk too. She was amazing, she helped me see things clear and helped me see I just needed to have confidence in myself. And to stop worrying about coping as I was. I had a happy little boy who loved me more than anything. I’m now starting a gingerbread group locally and getting out walking my dog and enjoying life with my little one coz it makes me happy. My point being. You can doing everything right and great. Believe in yourself your doing amazing on your own. Slow down and enjoy time with your little ones. Everything will fall into place when your happy and can think properly. If it will help contact your doc and explain you may need to talk to some one outside who doesn’t know you. Loads of hugs. You can do it xx

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