Am I being selfish?

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  • #31309 Report


    Hi there


    I am.looking for some advice if possible please. I am currently single and pregnant. My partner cheated during my pregnancy and we ended things however in the last few weeks he has said he is very sorry and wants me back and wants us to be a family unit however I have my guard up and I am unsure I could trust again.

    Due to this I am moving back with my.parents as when I thought I was going to be single I felt it would be more of a struggle to stay in my flat and afford it therefore made the decision to move back with my parents for 6 months to a year to allow me to save more so that I can then look for a 2 bedroom flat for me and the baby.


    I am due in january and the father does want to be a part of the babies life. Neither of us drive and my parents house is around a 15 minute train journey and then 15 minute walk to my parents house. I don’t know whether I am being selfish in moving? I know it is the right thing to allow me to save for the babies future but I can’t help but feel selfish and guilty.

    Most of my family stay where I am moving so I will have more support there but feel I am taking the baby away from the father.

    I don’t know if I an letting my emotions take over me and make me feel guilty.

    It is also difficult as due to the cheating my mum isnt his biggest fan now and he will need to visit her home to see the baby so it could make things tricky. It’s all making me very anxious and I think any advice and opinions would be much appreciated.



    #31313 Report


    Hi, it sounds to me as though the best thing for you right now is to move in with your family. That doesn’t mean that you are throwing your relationship away with your baby’s father, but right now you need the comfort and support of your family. While you live with them and save for your future, you can work on your relationship with baby daddy and discover if you can forgive him and maintain a healthy, happy relationship with him. You’re by no means being selfish. If he really wants to be with you and see his baby, he will happily do the commute.

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