Advise on Child Maintenance

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  • #60234 Report


    Hi all,


    I seperated from my ex Feb 2020. We had to live through lockdown together, with our 2 kids now age 5 and 20 months. I finally moved out in August 2020, and last minute my ex decided to move 3hrs away to his parents house…

    To cut a long story short we’ve spent the last 13 or so months trying to figure out long distance childcare. It’s been a nightmare to say the least, he’s a difficult person (emotional abuse, gaslighting, toxic relationship which led to me leaving) but we agreed a maintenance amount based on his wage and how often he had the girls.

    Until now he’s been having them 2 weekends a month (I wanted him to have them more!) but has just bought a house in the area and is moving in this weekend.

    We have finally agreed a care structure which is roughly a 50/50 split.

    I just did a bit it research online and discovered if care is split then no maintenance is due to be paid? Is this correct? I am currently on universal credit as I haven’t been able to work, but he works full time on a very good wage.

    How do others manage/organise who pays for things like school uniform and essentials?

    Obviously until now I’ve been paying for all clothes, uniform, everything. But should I be suggesting my ex gets a new set of uniform/clothes to keep at his house?

    Any advise would be hugely appreciated!






    #60558 Report


    Hi MegRM, I hope you make contact with other parents soon. Meanwhile, you may want to call our helpline to talk this through.

    best wishes, Helen

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