Abusive relationship

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  • #13884 Report

    unknown
    Participant

    I have recently separated from an emotionally abusive relationship and it’s taken me to leave to understand that our relationship was never 2 way and I’ve endured constant abuse. I was basically taken for granted. My feelings aside, he would rage, insult, belittle and was very selfish. He would drink a lot to the point he needed to drink in order to sleep at night !! He also reached a point where he was going to drink drive our 6 month old home.  Therefore I have huge concerns for my baby’s safety. He has no bond with her and hasn’t even fed her yet let alone me put her in his care!!

    has anyone had a similar situation and if so what contact did u see fit? My thoughts are to start with supervised visits until I can trust him?

    #13951 Report

    Ck2617
    Participant

    From been in an emotionally abusive relationship myself i decided to get a solicitor. Having explained this to my solicitor, she advised me that the abuse recieved is not relevant as the law only looks at the best interests of the child. Unless you have evidence stating he drinks a lot and was going to drink drive your daughter home that wont be listened to as he will deney it. Smart move to make would try to get him to say it in a text if you are concerned. In my opinion if he has no record of violence etc there is no reason he cant see the child, thats what the law states. My idea of contact would be say once a week to get started. Now if you have concerns id bring it up with the health visitor.

    Hope this helps.

    #14124 Report

    Sharont
    Participant

    Hi.  My ex was similar. There was nothing on record to back up my concerns.  I told the police that he was prone to drink driving. Luckily for me, it didn’t take them long to catch him. Once his license was taken away, I stood firm and told him if he drove with the kids in the car, I wouldn’t hesitate to report him. (I say this because a ban never stopped him from driving).

    It took a lot of courage for me to do it. He was furious and turned my kids against me at the time, but now that they’re older, they thank me for it.

     

    Good luck.

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