About to separate, worried about the days to come

[welshmat]

Hi,

First post from me and not one I thought I’d ever have to make. My wife is about to separate from our relationship after 6 years of marriage (15 years being together in total). Basically we’ve been through a very traumatic termination of a 4th pregnancy together recently and its heavily damaged our relationship to the point she feels she needs to leave to get space for herself to heal.

I’m very supportive of this and we are working very amicably at the moment both in honour of our relationship and children. I’m not sure whether we will move to divorce and have agreed to give it time.

I’m worried at the moment about the next days and weeks and whether people can share their experiences and advice on how to emotionally cope with the split. Looking for practical advice, not on how to get back together, but the simple things like what types of activities you do with your kids (ages 7, 5, 2) in the immediate term when they come to visit.

Looking forward to hearing from anyone.

[Star12]

Hi Welshmat,

Sorry to hear about your situation. Any separation is hard and emotionally challenging whatever the final outcome. Emotionally it seems to be a complete rollercoaster but I find dealing with it hour by hour, day by day sometimes is the only way forward.

As for doing things with the children as long as they have your time and attention when they are with you that’s all they need. On a practical note play centres are worth their weight in gold, although can work out a little pricey! We love outings to local museums which are free and often have free workshops on for little ones, or simply taking a picnic to the local park or castle or kicking about on the beach with a football. Other days are duvet days cwtched up in front of the TV watching a film with some popcorn.

I hope things work out for you and always here for a chat.

[welshmat]

Thank you so much for you advice. Really helpful.

[Author]

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