50/50 my ex wants

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  • #54724 Report

    Sazlar
    Participant

    Hi. I have just been to court for child arrangement order. And now he wants to go back for 50/50.

    He has been priming the children about living with him forever.. As the kids say. I have a 8,7,4 year old. They never hear anything nice about me. He never tells them to have a lovely time with mummy and see you next week. He has also breached his court order by contacting the children via gaming site and WhatsApp on their phones he gave them. His order was Tuesday and Thursday on a different phone. These mobiles were brought for traveling to school.

    I paperwork has just dried and he is now telling me he gonna go for 50/50, cos the kids want it. He and his family who live in same house are turning our children against me. My daughter told me (4) that aunty **** said I came from her tummy. So she is my mummy. She does everything you do!!

    We see her and her son everyday at school. She waits for me to turn up and then walks behind me. Sometimes my daughter will go and hold her hand. I don’t stop her. Although I’ve had emails from him telling me I do and how rubbish I am as a mother.. I have so many of those… Emails.

    I guess really question is can they apply for this just 1monnth after setting up children arrangements order?

    Who do I tell about him contacting them children outside her court order times.

    This all kicked off because CSA finally court up with his current employer which he did not like.

    And he has to pay extra because he stopped payments last year.. He just refuses to deal with anyone. He is a narcissist and told me when I left him he would make my life hell.

    My solicitor was totally rubbish and cost the earth. I’m hoping to see if I can get legal aid. As I am only on benefits.

    Any advice and help would be amazing.

    He emails me only now but this will be from 6.30 am till when he is finished…. Just never stops.

    He told me yesterday if I didn’t tell the csa the truth about how many nights he has them he would go court and go self employed.. Of  which he has not informed inland revenue of his second job. He drives his mother mobility car to work.. This is a man who lies about everything and in court.. Saying his mother would move out so he can have a room in the house.

    This house is 4 bedrooms. With 3 single adults and 3 boys and 1 girl.

    With dogs and kittens being breed for sale and a snake and chickens. Honestly it’s like a zoo but kids like it.. Ofcourse this income is always not declared too universal credits. Or inland revenue!

    I think people you can understand my concerns and worries..

    Heart broken mummy who’s holding on by her teeth. 💔

    #54726 Report

    steve3334
    Participant

    Hi,

    I think it would look very bad on him to return to court so soon. He would need to have a very good reason for it. child maintenance would not be a valid reason. Quite recently the courts released a statement that parents can face sanctions, for making unnecessary court applications. They want parents to make the most of mediation. I wouldn’t be surprised if they reject his application.

    #54737 Report

    Sazlar
    Participant

    <i>My main concern is the brainwashing he is doing. Everytime they come back from being with him and family they arw angry. Rude and sometimes crying. They say daddy tells them how much he will miss them and how sad he is without them. That is emotional blackmail. Also then they go on laptop and just found out he’s catching to them through gaming site. Then tells the kids it their secret.. I finally saw this and took a photo before they deleted it.  He is only meant to call the kids Tuesday and Thursday.</i>

    This is breaching his court order?? What do I do?

    #54741 Report

    steve3334
    Participant

    If the court order does not forbid him from having communications through gaming, social media, then he would not be breaching the order. the stuff about emotional blackmail/abuse is bad behaviour on his part. only way to address that would be talking to social services, or going back to court, which would be a lot of hassle and stress.

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