I have just joined the forum that I found through a search engine because I couldn’t find any social support.
My story has begun 3 years ago when i met my ex boyfriend. I was happy with him the first 2 years than everything turned upside down whe he decided to move out and have more space and assumed that we are argue a lot on a daily basis.
for the past months we have been seeing each other but he kept on telling me that nothing is serious but eventually continued to have sex together because for me he was the one that I still love and wanted to recover the retionship emotionnally.
I fell pregnant 3 months ago and short after I learned that he is dating another girl.
I am a foreigner in this country and have no member of family who lives around.
I haven’t told him that am pregnant because it happened before during our relationship and he affirmed that he didn’t want commitment and therefore I ended up have 2 termination in later stages.
I am 38 years old and I want to be mother but scared that I don’t have any support and when I think of abortion the idea that I won’t be able to get pregnant again haunts me.
I feel so depressed and I don’t know what to do, I love to be a mother but I do want to be selfish and prevent my baby to have a father or a family.
I know also I cannot approach my family for support because I come from a religiious background where having children out of marriage is not tolerated.
I am financially in a difficult situation also because I live on a low income based on my salary and I won’t be able to self fund my life expenses after birth.
I am already having pregnancy complications due to the fact of the stress.