Reply To: Access to babies

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Hi Twinsplus1,

Your Ex is bullying you, and you need to stop him now before the babies are born.

Access is based on what is best for the babies, so short frequent visits. Newborns need to be with their mum, to feed and bond and be close. No newborn should be taken from its mum for 6 hours a day, 5 days a week.

A court would allow 1-2 hours a day, every other day, in your presence. Plus babies need relaxed, happy mums.

Don’t put his name on the birth certificate.   Don’t give him legal rights he seems likely to abuse. For the first week or so, can you have a “gatekeeper” come and stay with you – mum, sister, friend – whose job is to filter his access to you and babies. Bullies are much less effective when there is a 3rd party present.

Apply to the family court for a child access order as soon as possible. His demands are unrealistic and the court will put a sensible routine in place.

Hopefully by day 4, he will tire of crying, nappy-filling babies and will accept sensible access.

Congratulations x