Reply To: My ex accuses me of being abusive when he is the perpetrator. Help!

Home Online forum Gingerbread Forum My ex accuses me of being abusive when he is the perpetrator. Help! Reply To: My ex accuses me of being abusive when he is the perpetrator. Help!

#40001 Report

Bunnyhop
Participant

Please do get in touch with womens aid and tell them what you have told us. They can talk you through all of this and offer a lot of expertise on this matter. They have a live chat that runs for a few hours each day or you can phone their helpline or send them an email. They deal with cases like this all of the time. You may also be able to find a solicitor who will represent you pro bono if you havent tried that already. Again they will be of massive help. Speak to your doctor and ask them for a letter talking about your mental health and the medications you are on, if you’ve ever metioned his behaviour to them as a reason behind your mental health its important they put this in the letter. You may have to pay a small fee for the letter. Go through your phone and look for any conversations with him or messages that could back up what you are saying and print off screen shots of them and put them in a folder to have as evidence if you need it. If you have spoken to your childrens teachers about his behaviour or the teachers have noticed changes in your childrens behaviour that could be linked to the abuse you could ask them to prepare a letter or report stating this.

Emotional abuse cases are a little more difficult than physical abuse because its harder to prove but not at all impossible and like I said there is support available to get you through. What I would say is look up these items as they may help you:

Narcissistic abuse
Cycle of abuse
Traumatic bonding
Idealization/devaluation
Ghosting/Hoovering
Gaslight
Concrete wall
Manipulation
Projecting Insecurity
Distorting Reality
Cliffhanger
Narcissistic Rage
Narcissistic Abuse Syndrome<!–/data/user/0/com.samsung.android.app.notes/files/share/clipdata_200514_083301_046.sdoc–>

I hope this helps. But please get in touch with womens aid. They were my rock when I was going through abuse. Stay safe