It sounds like you did exactly the right thing asking him to leave. Its a known fact that verbal abuse often esculates to physical abuse. Yes it must be very difficult for you right now, with the kids.. It is very early days and you will probably have him back. But, he is not calling to apologise? You had every right to say no to his family member staying. He was wrong and then to hurt you?! I would wait it out, i know its not easy, but let him make the first move, really see what he thinks/feels. Be honest with yourself, be kind to yourself and dont take any rubbish.