Reply To: Mediation-can I request a contact centre &drug tests

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Freda567
Participant

Thanks for your post.

that does throw a spanner in the works for me! I have no idea how to go about any of this. I just know he, in his current state isn’t fit to look after a houseplant, let alone a child.
every-time his mum has said anything,  (she still sees her grandchild on a regular basis) I have said he needs to contact mediation. Do I now wait for the letter calling me (which, I doubt will come) or seek legal advice beforehand?
I have spoken to woman’s aid and other charities when he decided not to have contact and then did want contact 10months ago, just to make sure what I was saying regarding mediation was right. They all said he needs to want to be a dad, you can’t force him and that was a starting point. I think I’ll call again and see what there recommendation is now, 10months on.
I’ve just got used to the fact he doesn’t want to be in her life and realised that this isn’t a bad thing! stepping away from an abusive relationship for a good period of time, makes you realise what a “spell”, how downtrodden you actually became.   Now I can’t help thinking, I’m going to become that person again if he pursues access.
I would honestly like him to be a part of her life, but after stepping back, all I can see is this amazing little human being wrecked by an addict. And any access needs to be controlled in a safe environment.