Reply To: Feeling leaft out of own life

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Hi amylou83

It feels like a horrible betrayal when friends and family seem to carry on as normal with your ex to your exclusion doesn’t it! I am going through similar, and I have to say I think I’ve been guilty of doing it to friends before i was in my own situation!

i just don’t think people who haven’t been through family splits really understand how it feels (I didn’t!)

but equally it’s not their problem…so whilst betrayal is how it feels, it’s also a heightened emotional response during a difficult period that (I think) will pass in time.

however a BEST friend should understand better than most, so that does sound particularly difficult. Have you explained how you feel to her? Not asking her to choose, but just telling her how difficult it is for you right now, like in your post, and what YOU need?

I’m not quite there yet myself – still seeing what side friends are going to settle on – but am anticipating I’ll naturally ‘lose’ some to him, or just to the change in my circumstances – some couples tend to prefer mixing with other couples so both have someone to talk to / or whatever their reasons! I’ve accepted that as i embark on this new chapter some people will drift out of my life – but others will drift in.

I wish you every success in rebuilding YOUR life – surrounded by people who care for and enrich you.