Reply To: Arrangements with child's father

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Lulublue
Participant

This sounds like a very similar situation to mine. My child is 2 and he’d pretty much gone before she was born. I have tried my hardest for him to have contact taking her over to him, him coming to mine (when she was really small), him having and open access arrangement to fit his work, a scheduled arrangement (lasted 2 weeks) then didn’t show, in the end after being sick of her not coming first and constantly being shouted at and made to feel bad for 18months .i said enough is enough!! You want to be a dad, you contact mediation and we can make an arrangement. 8 months on and no mediation request. People think I have stopped him seeing her and this hurts, I haven’t stopped him I just couldn’t continue with the constant barrage of shit, so put the ball in his court. The effects of people thinking I was in the wrong prompted me to  contact a contact centre for him. He ignored the request. In all honesty people who matter, will no how hard you’ve tried and will no how little he has anyone else really isn’t worth caring about.
It’s tough going and I know how the stress of the situation affects you and it’s hard. I now know my child has stability and is happier for it, but it will always hurt and frustrate me that he won’t make the move towards mediation. I would do it myself but I then feel like I’m forcing him to be a dad and spent almost 2 years doing that with no joy.
there really is only so much you can do xx