Reply To: I am soon to be a single dad. completely lost and any advice welcome.

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dadof2
Participant

Sorry to read about your predicament (and Needsmust’s).  I remember that grieving for the loss of my family prevented me from making the best practical decisions in the weeks following the separation.  I believe my ex-wife had figured all this out before she announced it was over, leaving me pretty vulnerable. I ended up agreeing to everything she asked thinking it was best for a potential reconciliation.

I’m not sure what advice to give here, because I’m not sure I would’ve listened to any in those early days thinking that my wife would never do anything (as Needsmust says) “just to win”.  One thing I can suggest is, don’t forget to take care of yourself during these early months.  If you can talk to a counsellor, try and do that.  If you can’t, talk to your friends, and family.  They will be less useful (unless they’ve lived through this) but your thoughts can’t stay in your head.  I’m sure you have your children’s interests at heart as most Dads do, but don’t neglect yourself.

Things will get easier.  I wish you all the best.