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Dadof12345
Participant

Thank you all for taking the time to reply to my post.

 

@solomummy; it would t make me feel better by refusing to pay to what the children need. I do it because it’s what my children need/want and if I didn’t, then they would go without. My CMS payments was just over £2000 for the year, yet I had paid my children’s mother in excess of £5000 for that period. The system should enforce that child maintenance is spent on the children directly and that would reduce the need for me to pay additional, however the way it works means that receiving parents are able to manipulate the system. My ex knows that I will buy the children what they need therefore the monies received from me can be spent on whatever she chooses. She’s not a bad mum and will take the children out occasionally etc. I’m not her slaying her, just the system.

@dadof2 I couldn’t agree more, as it’s been almost 6 years since we separated. Anything for a quiet life and as long as my children are happy is what I have been telling myself over the years. I’ve even had to return my car as I couldn’t afford to keep up with the payments and maintain my household as well as her. Hang in there mate and if you need anything, just pop me a message. Not glad to hear of your circumstances but glad to have found somebody who can relate.

 

@girlfriday  sorry to hear of your situation! You’re daughter is lucky to have you! The CMS should be used to handle situations like this in my opinion. My mother left my father when I was young and he raised us under similar circumstances. We had weekend contact with my mum, who paid nothing towards our upbringing but had wonderful holidays, cars a nice house etc. My dad was declared bankrupt twice and couldn’t afford basic needs. I fully support the CMS in these situations and it’s nice to here a receiving parents perspective on the CMS and my situation. Thank you for your kind words too!