Holiday period - 18/04/14 − 21/04/14

You are welcome to use our forums throughout the holiday period, however the forums will not be moderated between 18 April - 21 April. If you wish to report a post during this period, it will be dealt with as soon as possible on or after 22 April. If you are seeking urgent help, here is a list of organisations that are open during the Easter period.

We wish all our forums users and members a very happy Easter!

Signposting information for bank holidays

Domestic violence

If you are in immediate danger then call 999 for help. The organisations below can support you in deciding what to do about your situation and what options are open to you.

For women

National Domestic Violence Helpline

0808 2000 247

Welsh Women’s Aid

0808 8010 800

Scottish Women’s Aid

0800 027 1234

For men

Men’s Advice Line

0808 801 0327

Missing children

If your child has gone missing or you are concerned about abduction of your child call 999. The following organisations can support during this time.

Missing people

116 000


0116 255 6234

Confidential help if you have had a child abducted or you fear your child may be abducted

Child safety concerns

You can contact these organisations anonymously or telephone 999 if a child is in immediate danger.


0808 800 5000


0800 1111 (free from landlines)

For children and young people aged 18 and under in trouble or danger


If you have become homeless and need to find emergency accommodation contact your local council's homeless persons unit or Shelter.


0808 800 4444

Emotional health.

If your feelings are so overwhelming that you fear you may harm yourself or another person then call 999 and ask for help or go to your nearest accident and emergency department. The Samaritans or NHS services can help you in times of distress.


08457 90 90 90.

NHS Choices


NHS 24 Scotland

0845 24 24

Drugs and alcohol

If you need urgent help about drugs and alcohol you can contact talk to frank.

0300 123 6600 (24 hr)

We provide expert advice, practical support and campaign for single parents

  • Join us
  • Log in


Get chatting and meet new single parent friends in the Gingerbread online forums

How it works here

A guide to using the Gingerbread forums, plus our netiquette and rules.

Where to go for advice

Details of organisations, including Gingerbread, that can support single parents

If you need help urgently

If things get too much, details of where to go for immediate help


Posted Mon 31 Oct 2011 16:18

This year Christmas is going to be different as it is going to be our first split Christmas.
On the 23rd, My daughters and myself are going to my mom's and on the 24th we are opening presents, having our Christmas dinner and spending the day together. In the evening, Daddy is coming to pick them up and take them to his.In the morning they will be opening presents at his and then they are going to Grandma's in the afternoon for Christmas dinner and more presents. Then I will be picking them up on the 26th staying at Nana's then coming home on the 27th

Posted Thu 03 Nov 2011 00:49

Our first split Christmas too, found out today that he will be taking 3 little ones for approximately three hours during the evening on Christmas Day!!! That is all!!!
We still have alot of resentment issues!
However am really, really looking forward to Christmas this year Big Grin
Yours sounds really hectic Ashley, Do your family live local to you?

Posted Tue 08 Nov 2011 00:32

The first split Xmas is always hard.
Make sure that you have plans with friends for when the children go, be with people who can support you and do your best to enjoy all of it.
It gets easier in year two.

Posted Tue 08 Nov 2011 11:30

Ask Santa to write a magical letter to your child or grandchild and help children with a shortened life expectancy at Bluebell Wood Childrens Hospice this Christmas.

Posted Sat 12 Nov 2011 21:15

Our first split xmas too and I cant say it will be the same as the rest of them we've had. I have my daughter xmas eve and day and I will do my best to make it as normal xmas day as possible although it will be hard for me. Cooking for just myself and my 4 year old will be very different too but I have to get on with it I suppose, more for the sake of my daughter than me!

Posted Mon 14 Nov 2011 19:52

Ou first xmas alone too. Me and 2 year old daughter. She hasnt seen her dad all year since end January. My in laws will pop round xmas day and I will probably go to my parents Boxing Day. It is sad as this is a time that should be shared with her daddy too. I will be feeling sad for her but will try my best to make it extra special!! x

Posted Sat 19 Nov 2011 15:31

I spend xmas day on my own with my kids, we make it a day of favourite stuff. so last year, we had lasagne followed by chocolate pudding for our xmas dinner. have a movie afternoon watching the best films on telly or dvd. if it's just you and your girl(s) have a beauty and pamper couple of hours, painting nails and trying different hair styles. there's not many chances to spend the whole day together without rushing to school / work, so make the most of it and have great fun xx

Posted Sat 19 Nov 2011 20:41

Thats sounds a great idea of yours, more tailoring the day to suit the children rather than the traditional

Posted Sun 20 Nov 2011 20:15

Christmas should be a time to celebrate and be happy, but it seems like most people here will have a 'different' xmas this year. It will be different to me as well... I will celebrate xmas with my 8 months old son and my parents on 24th evening (as its our tradition in Brazil anyway) and on Xmas day his dad will come in the morning so we open the presents together, they play a bit here and my ex will take my son for around three hours to his family. I think it is fair enough to do that way.... we both celebrate with him somehow.
That is the plan at the moment, hopefully it will work out well... So hard this time of the year, xmas and new years eve... but 2012 will be an amazing year!!! positive thinking! :-)

Posted Mon 21 Nov 2011 13:54

My fiance/youngest's dad died on1st sept this yr. So it will be a first xmas without him. Our son is two but luckily he will have is older siblings from my previous marriage over and we will spend day at my mum's and step-dad's.

Posted Mon 21 Nov 2011 18:35

Im so sorry to hear that. It will be a very different xmas for a lot of us this year for different reasons. At least you have your family for that day and your two year old will have his siblings to entertain him - of course it will not be the same and I dont suppose you can bear it when people say they know how you feel.

Take care

Posted Thu 24 Nov 2011 21:58

My first christmas as a split family also this year. My son wont see his mother at all at the moment, my daughter will but she is not willing to do anything special with her over Christmas. She has not seen the kids for a couple of months - having to go via a contact centre at hte moment due to several attacks against me.

At least I know I will be able to give them a nice Christmas (hopefully in our own home, this homeless lark is a pain). I cook the best christmas dinner.

Posted Fri 25 Nov 2011 02:00

Bless you, its so hard at this time of year DuhhPat on the head it might be early but i hope you all have a really good time and you get to spend time with the people that care for you and dont forget we all need to feel appreciated, spesh at xmas, have a ball

steve x


all good things come to those that wait.

Posted Fri 25 Nov 2011 18:50

I hope with all of my heart that you all have a wonderful christmas. I have been a single parent for 4 years now, My ex husband has not had any contact with our sons for that last 3 years. He lives less than 10 miles away. This will be our 4th christmas alone, I dont know if its time or the fact that my children are in their teens but the whole christmas thing has become easier to get my head around and for us all to enjoy. My boys both know that money is tight and convince me that being together is more important than pressies. Be together, hug each other and remind each other how loved you are. Dont get me wrong, I wish I could give my bairns everything they want in the material sense I really do but now, as an adult thinking of my childhood christams' I remember the laughs, the jokes, the people and the security of knowing everyone around me loved me. Thats what they need the most :-) Lots of cyber hugs to you all and I hope you have a great time and wish you all the very best of everything for 2012 XxxX

Posted Wed 14 Dec 2011 16:18

It's been 2 years since we split up and he hasn't been around for the first two Christmas Days, I've offered him this one but he only wants half of it so will be up to court to decide what is best!! Struggling with the thought of not having him with me!!

Just a question to those with older kids, how have you got round the whole Father Christmas thing?? Mine is now older enough to count down on the advent calendar and knows Santa is coming..bit then he might not be at home for the Big Day!! Do you tell them Santa delivers to both houses just in case??!!

Posted Wed 14 Dec 2011 23:51

first christmas apart, have finally got a response from my solicitor that my ex is allowing me to have my boy for 2 hours ! an absolute nightmare but hope it gets better and easier for next year

Posted Mon 19 Dec 2011 19:03

this will be my first xmas without my husband of 24 years, left me for another woman a month ago. but i will have my three children with me which is a blessing, and he's coming to mine to see the kids for a couple of hours

48 active users

0 members, 48 guests